Pursuing Happiness
Hi,
This week’s email is about common issues that get in the way when we try to be happy.
Here are the key practical points you should know (mainly from this research article):
Often, the more strongly we pursue positive emotions, like happiness, the less likely we become to experience them.
One reason for this is that as we pursue happiness, we tend to set high or impossible standards for what it would look like, which can lead to discontent when we fall short of those standards.
Another reason for this is that we sometimes mispredict what will make us happy, which leads us to engage in ineffective or counterproductive activities.
As we pursue happiness, we also tend to actively monitor our pursuit of this goal, which can hinder our ability to be happy.
To avoid the paradoxical negative effects of actively pursuing happiness, you should (1) make sure to set reasonable expectations for what your happiness will look like; (2) focus on productive ways to increase happiness, by asking yourself whether any given activity or thing is likely to actually make you happy; and (3) try to monitor your happiness less while prioritizing habits that automatically make you feel happier.
As always, I’m happy to hear your thoughts.
Have a great week,
Itamar